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Monday, October 01, 2007

a blessing in disguise, he said. and i hope it is. in fact, it seems to be. =D

zhi shi jian jian dan dan de ai go
wo hai shi wo...

wo hai shi wo

internship's finally over and done with. OVER OVER OVER! the whole nightmare jailterm is finally overrrr!! come on babyyyy, give me some hugs everybardayyy!! *grins so widely you can see my fillings* =P heh.

i guess up till today, nobody would really realise what it felt like to be me. there are many things that are not seen, but now i know i have a problem. and i'm not gonna let it manifest in me. everything else can be a problem. but i cannot let myself add to my problems. once i succumb. nobody can help me. only i can help myself.

this is a turning point i guess. a road that i've travelled that i have reached a junction with a few choices. a right turn or a left. a u turn or i can dive right ahead. the u turn has tempted me and it seems like a safe choice too. but i know i can't turn around. i have to find myself back. but not return entirely to what i was. because there are certain things i need to change. so life will never be the same again.

i really missed you. i've thought about it and i think i see some light. you're so important to me but i can't let you be my world. i need a bigger world. i can't be so dependent. i guess i need to learn. it's always a learning process and i think i'll always be learning. i really missed you though. =D

i told jce once that i'm afraid to lose this treasure that i've found. jce said that everyone is afraid of losing their treasures and gems. the more precious the treasure is, the more afraid you'll be to lose it. and the more precious the treasure is, the chances of losing it is greater. but we gotta know how to take care of it. protect it. hold it close to us, but not guard it too closely to arise the suspicion of others. we got to be sensitive to its needs. how it needs to be polished to shine. only then can we keep it. but we can never eliminate the risk of others stealing it from us.

haha. i think she's one of the few people who can engage in such treasure talks with me which signifies bigger things in life.

i have so much to learn but if the promises still stand, then i have a whole lifetime to learn and be a better girl. =D

tmr i'll be off to batam with carmen. (x happy as can beee!!!

if someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, it doesn't mean that they don't love you with all they've got.

i do, cherish you.
-cheryl
10:47 PM





Cheryl

pretty faces