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Thursday, May 10, 2007

i finally feel my moods beginning to lift abit. having work to keep me busy allows me to stop thinking those weird negative thoughts. i just hope every working day keeps me occupied cos i feel bored easily. had a good lunch with my bosses in their office. they called for oishi pizza. should try that, it's really pretty good if you like jap cuisine. made me feel so much happier. however, i don't quite grasp why i always feel a little sick after lunch. the tinge of headache and nausea that hits me and the feeling that i can't quite comprehend. think i'm still not used to sitting at a desk one whole day.

i was just thinking about the recent injury and what it has turned me into lately...there're some things that i've discovered about myself. i've always been an independent person, never wanting to knock on other's doors or wear some other's shoes. even at the worst of times, and usually at these downer days, i'm usually lonesome. i do have many good friends who'd be willing to stand by me but often i'd rather get through those dark days on my own and come back only when the sun's up.

this time's different. somehow i feel needy. i feel dependent. and i realise it is because i found the source of dependency that i've always been searching for. a source i feel the need to lean on and would rather lean on than having to be alone and forlorn ever again. somehow it feels better to have a pillar to lean on than to be independent. sometimes we all just need to feel helpless and we all need someone to care for us, don't we all?

life's down to waking up, going to work, going back, having dinner and immediately hitting the sack and then it goes on again, a vicious cycle. gone were the days i could stay up chatting. gone were those days i could just stay up thinking and doing meaningful nothings. gone were those days and i'm yearning for them to be back again. i just need alot of rest now, need to recharge, am confident i'll be up and running again...i hope.

life goes on, everything moves along...somehow meeting the wolves seemed different yesterday. just a few weeks and the distance has stretched. i guess people do have to learn to adapt and move on, after all, change is constant, ain't it?

so it's just back to me, myself and my emails and work.

imissyou.
-cheryl
1:34 PM





Cheryl

pretty faces